Beginning a Relationship

Within the Vedic cultural tradition, marriages were formerly arranged by parents, in consultation with priests and astrologers. Girls were married from a young age, and there was no social interaction between boys and girls before marriage. Women who had been thus protected would become devoted to their husbands for life, and there was no such thing as divorce. While these practices are no longer commonplace, the principles that lie behind them are always important."Woman is compared to fire, and man is compared to a butter pot. Therefore a man should avoid associating even with his own daughter in a secluded place. Similarly, he should also avoid associating with other women. One should associate with women only for important business and not otherwise." (Srimad Bhagavatam 7.12.9).

Meeting Online

To begin a relationship from a distance, by correspondence, is a safer and more gradual system of getting to know someone than by direct physical association. There is less emphasis on external attraction and more on personal attributes. KrishnaMarriage.com is a facility for devotees to meet with prospective partners online, correspond online, and get to know a good deal about each other before deciding whether to pursue a relationship.

A word of caution, however. Online correspondence alone is not a sufficient basis for a marriage. An online relationship may leave us with an idealised picture of of our future partner. Reference checks, astrological charts, and meeting in person are all important as well, preferably in that order.

For Your Protection

As conditioned souls in this material world we are subject to four defects. We have imperfect senses, we tend to commit mistakes, we tend to cheat, and we become illusioned. Therefore it is advisable to hear from reliable sources on important matters, rather than simply depending on our own judgement. For this reason KrishnaMarriage.com includes a reference check system, so that you can run a background check on your prospective partner at any stage in the proceedings. Every member is required to provide names and email addresses of 1-3 senior devotees for reference purposes. Please bear in mind, however, that this is a preliminary check, and not a basis for marriage. Further research is strongly recommended.

Also for your protection, the messaging service allows you to correspond with another member without revealing your personal email address.

Compatibility

To find out more about potential compatibility, it is advisable to consult a qualified Vedic astrologer. (See 'Signs of Compatibility').

Meeting

Once you have ticked all the boxes, the final stage will be to meet up in person. Here the sages advise you to proceed with caution.

"The human being is a social animal, and his unrestricted mixing with the fair sex leads to downfall. Such social freedom of man and woman, especially among the younger section, is certainly a great stumbling block on the path of spiritual progress. Material bondage is due to sexual bondage, and therefore unrestricted association of man and woman is surely a great impediment." (Srimad Bhagavatam 3.12.28 Bhaktivedanta purport).

If you respect each other as vaisnavas and associate together in a spiritual way, keeping Krishna at the centre of your discussions and activities, there should be no problem. It will be safer to meet up together with other devotees or in public places. Remember to treat each other with dignity and respect and avoid physical contact.

At the same time, it is important to be honest and truthful in your dealings, and get to know as much as you can about each other, by observing each other in real-life situations. Take as much time as you need to be sure.

Blessings

If you both decide that you would like to go ahead with marriage, the final step will be to seek permission and blessings from your spiritual master(s), parents, and senior vaisnavas. This will make everything auspicious for marriage.

Please let us know if you have found your life partner from KrishnaMarriage.com. With your permission, we would like to publish your story.